Tears with the Rain
by Shattered.Angel.Saved
Summary: Rated 'T' for depression, attempted suicide...Turns to Drindy. Expansion of SorrowNoMore's "Welcome to my Life"
1. Contemplating Help

A/N Okay, so this is my first official fanfic. By that I mean I gave up on the rest BUT I AM FINISHING THIS ONE. I promise. Special thanks to SorrowNoMore for letting me write this "expansion" of the story "Welcome to My Life". I loved it, it's a songfic, so check it out? The first chapter's going to be like an introduction…I basically re-worded what SorrowNoMore said, I kept a few of her pieces, they are in quotes…yeah…I tried not to plagiarize…let's see how it goes…Reviews are appreciated…Anything you want to hate on? Bring it on XD I'm trying to be a better writer. Thanks!

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><p>It had been weeks since he was "done" with Drake. He was also the popular kid now. He was the one to get the girls-well he would, if he wasn't dating Mindy. Drake had given up on insulting Mindy. He had given up on a lot of things. Drake's life was falling apart. Numbness was conquering Drake for at least a week. Nobody noticed, nobody seemed to care. Josh was so much happier in life. He was getting along with Helen-he even beat her at tennis. His grades were now higher than Mindy's for once. Drake wouldn't get in the way anymore. It wasn't even possible, all Drake did was listen to depressing music all of the time.<p>

He didn't go on dates anymore. The once flirtatious Drake Parker was now a single, unwanted, depressed human that no longer even cared about his appearance. Long sleeves to cover the cuts he thought would help him cope. He even gave up on combing his hair. Even trying to write more music barely helped him cope with the depression. He felt out of place. Alone. Lost. Everyday he had to fight temptation to leave Belleview. Every time, he just felt like he would just do something stupid. Just like everyone expected him to.

He was smart, if anything, he could graduate in high honors-if he cared. He saw no point in applying himself. When Megan is your sister or Josh is your brother, everyone expects you to be this genius like them. No, Drake suspected everyone just saw him as the drop-out with good music. Any song he'd have written would just seem like another song written by him. Not seeing it for what he was hoping for-an escape.

Day by day, Drake was falling deeper into the black hole of depression. His band was all he felt like he had, but they didn't seem to like him anymore. He would just the members harder so he could prove to himself that he could do better-be good at something.

He just lost hope.

He remembered going through this before. He got over it-eventually. Last time never got as bad as this, though. "Drake was hurt, lost and drowning in a sea of depression. He had been here before, when his Dad had walked out on them. His mom had sent Drake to a shrink, and believed in the end that he had made it home in one piece. She had no idea he was still shipwrecked on an island, and now his supplies were dwindling. Josh had appeared in his life then, like a life boat. Before he got to shore, Josh had given up on Drake, and he had tried to swim after Josh, not wanting to let him go. As a result Drake was wet, cold, and trapped in the dark waters." (SorrowNoMore, I liked the metaphor too much to get rid of :D I'll post a link to the story at the end of the chapter…)

It had started again; Drake was cutting again. Josh's words were the new knife to slice his skin. Last time was so long ago-almost seven years. He promised he wouldn't go back, but old habits are eventually going to come back. So here they were, knocking on the doorsteps of his mind.

His mind was now engraved with hurtful memories off what Josh said to him. He was trying to get help from anyone at this point. He was just too scared to admit it. They would just see him as selfish-desperate for attention. What else was new?

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><p>AN I know it wasn't very different from the original piece, which can be found here: .net/s/7264440/1/Welcome_To_My_Life

A special thanks to SorrowNoMore.

Also, I think I mentioned before that the rest of the story will be actual stories. I hope to post the next chapter soon. I am working on another piece for the Drake and Josh archives, so that will be up soon. It's pretty dark so I might post it under 'M'...Reviews please?


	2. Plans

A/N I decided to get second chapter up today, too. This is based off of "Perfect World"-The second chapter in "Welcome To My Life." I hope you like it! Please review!

_His mind was now engraved with hurtful memories off what Josh said to him. He was trying to get help from anyone at this point. He was just too scared to admit it. They would just see him as selfish-desperate for attention. What else was new?_

(Drake's POV)

Thunder…hmm…Walter was right for once…Maybe he'd help me? Ha! As if. It's not that he's a bad step dad, he just doesn't seem to be...he and I just don't see eye-to-eye. I'm hungry…what do we have for food…?

I opened the fridge, tempted by the chocolate pudding calling my name on the shelf. On second thought…I guess I'm not hungry. I guess I'll just drink some water. Eh…second thought…I'm just going to go to bed.

**T**

I felt something hit my head. A pillow? Ugh! Josh…of course.

"Mom wants you up. Time for dinner."

I looked over at the clock on my way out. How long was I asleep? It's six thirty now…who cares? Hm…maybe they'll notice tonight? Screw it, they'll never help me. They'll never care.

As I walked, I could feel my heart pounding. Anxiety. Great. What happens when they find out? Will they understand? Maybe not…

I sat down, ignoring my shaking hands. Mom made chili. I love chili…well, mom's recipe. Most people make it too watery. I ate the chili, not realizing that it was the only thing I ate today. When was the last time I ate? Yesterday at dinner…before that? Wow…I only eat at dinner…That explains why I've been hungry. Whatever.

"So, Megan, how was school today?"

"It was awesome! You know that substitute we all hate?"

"Mr. Brooks?" Josh chimed in.

"Yeah. He had some sort of allergic reaction to the new coffee flavor he tried. We ended up going to the cafeteria and watched movies until the assembly WHERE I got a citizenship award."

"Wow, Megan. So proud of you." Audrey smiled, turning to Josh. "What about you? How did school go?"

"You know that teacher that hates Drake? Mrs. Hayfer? Well she had to drop her daughter off at a doctor's appointment. Because of this, our exams got postponed. Another two days to study the vocabulary words."

"Nice." Audrey laughed.

No I'm not here or anything. My day sucked, actually. A girl rejected me, I broke my knife, and have to somehow explain to mom why I need a new one…

That was it.

If I asked her for a new supply of help, she would help.


	3. Pain

A/N I know it's been far too long since I've updated! It's been such a crazy year so…yeah. The chapters are going to get a bit longer, but there might be less content…anyways, here it is…

Fail. At least I got a new knife, I guess.

But how could she not catch it? She gave me a new one-just like that…

_**T**_

With a deep breath he took his anger out on his wrist, sliding the sharp metal across his pale skin. Dozens of scars lingered over his wrist, nobody had yet seen them.

It was almost time for Drake to head to school. He had started to take the bus, seeing as Josh would refuse to drive him. His grades went from a D average to As and Bs.

And yet nobody had noticed.

This was exactly what he did before. He saw no point in caring about his grades, what reason was there to? Now there was a reason. He needed help, but he couldn't ask for it.

The bells had rung. Drake was barely on time for chemistry. Anxiety bled through his eyes. He felt Josh's glare pierce his skin. He felt his teacher's annoyed face glued to his face. All of the kids he used to call his friends ignored him.

Drake had lost everything.

_**T**_

Lunch had finally come. Drake wasn't hungry, but he was relieved to finally escape the boredom of each class. It also did not help that they were in the same classes.

Every.

He felt his angered eyes stab his soul.

Single.

He knew he was just going to have to ignore Josh.

Class.

This would be harder than he thought.

Drake crept toward Josh, knowing they had to talk.

"What?" He rolled his eyes at the musician.

"Can we talk?" He cleared his throat, "Like now?"

Josh sighed, standing up. He followed Drake to the empty hallways.

"What?" He repeated the word harshly.

"Look man, I said I'm sorry, don't you get that I mean it? I'm freaking out here."

"No surprise there." His words were bullets, fired from his mouth to Drake's brain. They would linger there forevermore, "You just disappoint everyone around you. Every. Single. Person."

He walked back to the cafeteria, leaving Drake alone, tears burning his eyes.

_**T**_

Josh hadn't bothered to tell Drake dinner was ready…again. It had been months since he actually ate a meal. He wasn't vain anymore. He never even bothered to look in the mirror. Why should he care how he looked? Nobody cared about him.

He dragged the knife over his skin once more, blood crawling away from the wound.

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><p>So yeah...my laptop's acting up, so I can't post until I get a new laptop. I;m going to post two chapters AND a new story!<p>

Thanks for standing by!

Shattered Out!


	4. Suicide is Painless

A/N Thank you guys! I know I need to get more on top of this...I'm thinking three more chapters...Also, I'm posting the start of a Supernatural story, so if you're into the show...yeah

Reviews much appreciated but not entirely necessary...

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><p>Days had passed the same way, and the amount of scars on his wrist increased. He looked for his long sleeved shirts.<p>

No luck.

_Nobody's gonna see it anyway. Why does it matter anymore?_

Drake threw on his Black Souls tee shirt and left for school. Each class had flown by, but only because Drake had his mind on other things. When lunch had come, things just got…difficult.

Mindy walked over to Drake, glancing at his wrist. She knew she shouldn't say anything about it…not yet, anyways. She sat next to him, confused by the no remarks made.

"I broke up with Josh."

"I'm sorry." Drake sounded sincere, but Mindy knew otherwise.

"Megan told me about what's been going on with you two. It's clearly badly affecting you. I tried talking to him, but he didn't listen, so…I broke up with him."

"Thanks but not needed. He wouldn't care no matter what."

"He cares. They care. They probably just have a lot going on."

"I guess."

The bell rang for next class. Drake had not eaten anything, and Mindy assumed why. She knew she'd have to get through to him.

_**T**_

Drake got back to the now empty house. Josh was at work, Megan out with her friends, and his mom and Walter at a weather convention. Drake had a good few hours to himself.

All he needed.

He cleaned up everything in the house, making it spotless. He even made Josh's bed, just to do something right for once. He had neatly written a note to each member of his family, placing them on their pillows. He knew they wouldn't miss him, and he knew they thought he was just there, wasting life away.

He called Mindy, the only one he could say cares. But she liked Josh; she only broke up with him because of him.

"Drake?"

"Hey, um I'm not going to be in school tomorrow."

"Why? You sick?"

_Does mentally count?_ "Yeah. I'll talk to you later. Goodbye."

He hung up, placing the phone in his pocket. He headed to the bathroom, sliding into the empty tub. He slowly dug his blade across both of his wrists, ignoring the bitter taste of pain.

He slowly drifted into unconsciousness.

_**T**_

Drake had woken up. He was not sure of where he was. He felt a needle piercing his skin, and the coldness of metal bars against his arms. He was in a hospital.

His mother looked up with thankful eyes, silently crying.


End file.
